Parents Under Pressure
The United States Surgeon General, Dr. Vivek H. Murthy has issued an advisory to call attention to the enormity of parents’ stress and mental health. He cited a recent study by the American Psychology Association that reported nearly half of all parents in this country say that most days their stress is overwhelming. Yet, 65 percent of these parents admit that they don’t talk about their stress because they don’t want to burden others.
As a psychologist who provides therapy during pregnancy, postpartum, and into parenting, I can attest to what Dr. Murthy is reporting-- parents are stressed! You might be saying to yourself— “duh, parenting is stressful, that isn’t news.” What I find most interesting about this report though, is that 65 percent of parents aren’t talking about it. When we experience stress but must keep it in or feel as though we’re a burden to others, this is even worse for our mental health. In his editorial in The New York Times, Murthy wrote: “Stress… can easily affect people’s mental health and well-being. And we know that the mental health of parents has a direct impact on the mental health of children.”
Parental stress and mental health issues have lasting impacts on children. I’ve shared about this in some of my other blogs, but parental stress, aggression, and mental health issues can impact your child’s cognitive development and impact their academic success. Research also suggests it is a factor in emotional difficulties for children later in life, and they are more likely to experience anxiety, depression, and other social-emotional and relationship issues.
I frequently see parental stress first-hand and observe the impact it has as a therapist for moms. In fact, new moms particularly experience a variety of stressors that can make it difficult for them to function in daily life. In fact, 50 percent of parents say that when they are stressed, they can’t bring themselves to do anything. Unfortunately, that might also mean seeking help. The demands of parenting, and the complex emotions that go with them, exacerbated by unrelenting stress, can lead to a sense of isolation and loneliness. Sixty-two percent of parents today report that no one understands how stressed out they are.
If you are a parent under pressure and can relate to these feelings, I want you to know you are not alone. Getting help can be hard, especially when it falls to the very bottom of your packed “to do” list. Perhaps right now, you are just looking for more information and resources. Some places I recommend checking out for more would be: The Surgeon General’s office, The American Psychological Association, and a directory of therapists in your geographic area.
If you’re ready to take the next step and want to learn more about how therapy can help, click here to get in touch and we can set up a free fifteen-minute phone call. I am authorized by PSYPACT to meet with patients across most states in the country via tele-health. Parents who prioritize the well-being of their entire family can get the support they need to identify the sources of stress and find healthy ways to overcome their detrimental effects. Parenthood isn’t perfect, but it can definitely be “good enough.”