Therapy for anxiety and perfectionism — for women who hold it all together at a cost only they can see.
You're the one people come to. The one who has it figured out. The reliable one, the capable one, the one who always delivers. But inside, the story is different. You're running on adrenaline and self-criticism, and the gap between how you appear and how you feel keeps getting wider.
Maybe anxiety shows up as a constant low hum of dread that something is about to go wrong. Maybe it's the inability to rest without guilt, or the way your mind replays conversations and decisions long after everyone else has moved on. Maybe perfectionism has been your engine for so long that you don't know who you are without it, but you're starting to realize it's burning you out.
You're not weak for struggling with this. You're exhausted from holding a standard that was never sustainable. And you deserve support that goes deeper than "just try to relax."
This might sound familiar
You set impossibly high standards and then punish yourself for falling short
You say yes to everything because saying no feels selfish or risky
You can't turn your mind off. Even when you're supposed to be resting, you're planning, replaying, or worrying
You struggle with imposter syndrome despite evidence of your competence
You feel responsible for everyone else's feelings and needs
You know you're burning out but you don't know how to stop without everything falling apart
If you recognized yourself in more than one of those, you're not alone. These patterns are incredibly common among high-achieving women, and they respond well to therapy. The fact that you're reading this page is already a sign that something in you knows the current pace isn't sustainable.
How therapy helps.
Anxiety and perfectionism are patterns that usually started as protection, they’re not character flaws. At some point, being perfect or being prepared kept you safe. The problem is that what worked then is now running your life in ways that leave no room for rest, mistakes, or being human.
In therapy, we'll work together to understand where these patterns come from, how they show up in your daily life, and what it would look like to loosen their grip without losing the parts of yourself you value. We'll build practical tools for managing anxious thoughts and reducing self-criticism, while also doing deeper work on the beliefs driving the cycle.
I draw from cognitive behavioral therapy to address the thought patterns, psychodynamic work to understand their roots, and mindfulness practices — including breathwork and body-based techniques from my training as a certified yoga teacher — to help you regulate your nervous system, not just talk about your stress.
This isn't about becoming someone who doesn't care. It's about building a life where you can be ambitious and compassionate with yourself at the same time.
I'm Dr. Vanessa Vitiello — a licensed clinical psychologist (PsyD) with specialized training in anxiety, perfectionism, and perinatal mental health. I completed my postdoctoral fellowship at The Motherhood Center of New York and I'm a certified yoga teacher (RYT-200).
I work with women who are high-achieving, driven, and used to figuring things out on their own — and who are starting to realize that self-sufficiency has a ceiling.
Anxiety during pregnancy and postpartum.
If your anxiety has intensified during pregnancy or after having a baby, you're not alone. Perfectionism and motherhood are a particularly intense combination — the same traits that made you successful at work can make you feel like you're failing at parenthood.
I specialize in perinatal mental health and have advanced training through my fellowship at The Motherhood Center of New York. If your anxiety is connected to becoming a parent, I can help with both the anxiety itself and the unique emotional landscape of this transition. You can learn more on my Postpartum Anxiety page.
Some things to know before we start.
Sessions: 45 minutes, held weekly via secure, HIPAA-compliant video. No commute needed — attend from wherever you are.
Rate: $300 per session. I am out-of-network with all insurance plans. I provide monthly superbills for reimbursement and most clients with OON benefits receive 50–80% back. HSA and FSA accepted. Sliding scale available on a limited basis.
Location: I see clients throughout New York and New Jersey — including Westfield, Summit, Short Hills, Millburn, Montclair, and surrounding communities — and across 39+ states as a PSYPACT provider.
Your first step is a conversation.
I offer a free 15-minute consultation so we can talk about what you're experiencing and whether working together is the right fit.